If Anything Happens To Lechonk I Will Hurt You All

thegamer.com:

The new Pokemon Scarlet & Violet trailer just revealed a bunch of new details, including (deep breath now): the new Legendaries, the new Professors (smoking hot and also time travellers, by the way), a new co-op mode, non-linear storytelling, and a release date. Click all of those links to get the boring stuff out of the way, and then head back here for the good stuff: Lechonk. All you need to know about the upcoming launch of Gen 9 is that Lechonk will soon be in your life. If any harm comes to Lechonk I will slay you all until I have my vengeance, in this life or the next.

We have some pig Pokemon already, but here's the thing - I hate them all so I'm going to act like we don't. Tepig? Fine, but like pretty much every Fire starter it gets worse as it evolves. Spoink is an ugly little grey blob with a massive pimple on its head, and Grumpig is covered in warts. I'm not even going to dignify Munna with a response here, and while Swinub is clearly swine-inspired, it quickly becomes a woolly mammoth. You could count tapirs as pigs, but that would only give me Drowzee, so... no. I don't think I will. That means, ignoring all of the terrible ones, we have no pig Pokemon. None at least until Lechonk comes wee wee wee all the way home.

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Lechonk is beautiful, perfect, and cuddly. However, I'm still a little worried about it. Pokemon has a habit of providing us with cute and lovely Pokemon and then evolving them into something gross and vulgar. You don't even need to move away from pigs for it to happen - it's the reason I won't count Tepig as a great little piggy. Lechonk has watery eyes, which make it look positively adorable, but they could quickly become sunken,