This piece is being written on a train as I trundle towards our very first staff meeting with Rock Paper Shotgun's new overlords. The morning is cloudy but bright and calm, the north London suburbs are a blissful checkerboard of red roofs and flourishing lawns, hope glistens faintly in the gutters and ditches beside the tube. How unlike the innards of Centum, a point-and-click horror game (Steam page here) that begins with a dreary retro desktop interface on which there are curious text files, curioser decryption tools and most curious of all, an .exe of some kind that drops you into a simulation consisting of a stone prison chamber. Hang on, I'm changing trains...
...I have now changed trains. Stuff and tarnation, there's nowhere to sit in this one and the carriage is full of excited children with musical voices and untarnished souls. How unlike the stone prison chamber of Centum, in which you are alone save for the occupant of a rathole - possibly a rat, though a talking one with unnecessarily large teeth - and a monstrous, multiple-headed jailor called the Judge, who appears each in-game morning to ask questions such as "What was the promise you made?" and then accuses you of lying, regardless (I think) of your answer.
Not all that alone, then. This is quite a populous prison cell, actually. There's a boy made of darkness, too, who wants to know if you're his friend, and I guess those disembodied eyes in the shadows count as cellmates?
There's also a window which - once you've found an object you can use to clean it - looks out over a city of tombstone-shaped blocks and towers. "The sky is dead," reads some accompanying text. "The gods are dead. The gods are merciful. All the city can do is weep." Still, it's easier on the eyes and ears than Finchley Road. Turn back to the table in the middle of the cell and you will find a nice cup of what could be tea and a wailing cosmic cube, a bit like Hellraiser's puzzlebox but a touch more Macintosh. Who you are is
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