If there’s one thing I love more than Castlevania, it’s the fantasy that someone can find me interesting enough to extend our companionship beyond the boundaries of a five-minute conversation about the weather. Ah, yes, that’s the good stuff. Now, what if you took Castlevania and mashed it up with my delusions of tolerability? You’d get Romancelvania, which sounds like a pun that is trying too hard until you realize it’s a play on the word Transylvania and not Castlevania. Video games have warped my perspective on puns, apparently.
However, the way of executing this sort of composition eluded me when I heard the pitch. I could think of a few ways to approach it, and each sounded rather precarious. I’m happy someone is making the attempt, even though I’m skeptical. After spending some time with Romancelvania’s demo, I’m not fully convinced they can pull it off, but I’m satisfied that the project is moving in the right direction.
The setup is almost flawlessly clever. You play as Dracula, 99 years after being defeated by humans. The humiliation of being whipped into submission has caused your lover to abandon you and all your followers to start questioning your leadership. You’ve been moping ever since.
Your buddy, Death, has gotten tired of your constant whining and sets you up on a reality dating show. A number of potentially lucky guys and ladies are scattered throughout your newly renovated castle, waiting for you to put the moves on them. Or you can just be friends, which is nice to know. Not everyone is into Incubi, so having the option to keep things platonic is appreciated.
To win them over, you need to pick the best answers from a dialogue tree, complete sidequests for them, and take them on dates.
You also have
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