How I Ended Up in a Tinder Ad Campaign

pcmag.com:

If you visit Tinder.com, you'll find me on the left side of the frontpage. Really! I’ve been using Tinder on and off for the past four years, so much so that my Twitter mutuals know me for being the slightly funny Tinder guy. So, it’s only appropriate that I'm featured in an advertisement for an app that has caused me so much pain and only occasional pleasure. If you're curious how this happened, I’ll start from the beginning. Disclaimer: This is probably the dumbest, Gen Z thing you’ll read today, and I’m not sorry.

Tinder is a horrible app, all things considered. It may be a PCMag Editors' Choice winner, but the dating app is intentionally designed to swindle money from desperate men. We all know how it works: you swipe, you match, you ignore each other. If you're lucky, you'll both circle back around, discover you're the perfect match, and get married. Ask anyone in your social circle for their Tinder opinions, and they’ll share nothing but horror stories. It’s addictive, predatory, and slightly racist.

With that said, I’d like to introduce you to my Tinder PowerPoint presentation:

I made this wonderfully articulate self-pitch presentation on a cold night in Alaska during my sophomore year of college. The PowerPoint featured six slides that delved into why you should give me a...chance.

The University of Alaska Anchorage, where I attended college and where I made this work of art, is a small school. The six students who saw my profile had a laugh and moved on with their lives. Life went on, I stayed single, we got a new governor, he put our school into financial hell, and I decided to continue my studies at the University of North Texas.

Fast forward to a Target parking lot last August. I was in my car getting cooked