NFTs and the Metaverse. These are the ideas millionaire investors and the strange man in the pub who mumbles to you over a frothy pint of Fosters and blackcurrant are hedging their bets on. At the heart of the Metaverse lie several hundred user-generated projects and marketplaces, a whole ecosystem of experiences, games, and most importantly, transactions, the prospect of which has the planet’s most hideously rich salivating like the gruesome creatures they are. The Metaverse, it turns out, is a bizarre, feverish hellscape, a place of heavy dubstep, bright lights, empty NFT galleries, and strangers telling you to go fuck yourself. Come with me on a journey into Decentraland.
The story begins with a rave, although to call it a rave is to refer to your Year Six school disco as the Hacienda. I wasn’t in attendance but, like some omnipresent internet slug, phoned in from Twitter and watched several nondescript characters dance around a Roblox town hall with some 2004 tinny drum and bass played by two hoodie-wearing DJs via livestream. It was atrocious. Not just atrocious. It was sad. I actually felt sad.
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Despite the collective tears of polar bears, cheetahs, and Asian elephants running down my face as I watched the world burn for Roblox raves, I decided the pure weirdness of the event warranted at least some degree of further investigation. What awaited me in Decentraland was more bizarre than I expected. Say hello to Dr. Bruno, my Decentraland alter ego.
As you can see from the image, I am standing on a Ferris wheel. It’s one of the main attractions attached to the Australian Open live event currently taking place in Decentraland, an event which
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