Playing Elden Ring As A Jouster Is The Best Way To Explore The Lands Between
When I was kid there was no better day out than going to Camelot. Not like, actual Camelot, as nobody knows where that was actually located (it’s probably Tintagel Castle in Cornwall though), but a run-down theme park in Lancashire. It’s been abandoned for years now, but it was pretty grotty when it was open, too. Look, not every company has DisneyWorld money.
The rides were bang average - there was a log flume and a dragon-themed one that slowly lapped the circumference of the park, and I think one that did a loop-the-loop to make things really exciting. But as a kid obsessed with all things knights and dragons, the park itself was the main attraction. The walls were actual ramparts, you entered through castle gates, and staff were dressed as knights and jesters. It was everything a kid could want.
Related: A FromSoftware Noob’s Guide To Elden Ring
The highlight, though, was the jousting tournaments. Held every hour, two knights in not-so-shining armour would ride their horses at each other full pelt in a scripted performance to end all performances. I was a complete mark, screaming at the Black Knight’s cheating ways and cheering on the heroic Sir Lancelot who would always overcome the odds and clutch it out at the last - usually with a glorious sword fight like something straight out of the Lord of the Rings.
The actors were proper stunt people; they fell off horses and shields spectacularly shattered when an opposing lance hit them square on. It was adrenaline-filled excitement, and I ate up every second. I also ate up a slice of some kid’s birthday cake that a knight presented him because, well, who can say no to cheap cake?
Anyway, my boss says I have to talk about video games at TheGamer, so I guess I should stop
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