Guessing How Well Every Overwatch Tank Could Drive A Real Tank

thegamer.com:

When I play Overwatch, I bounce between DPS and Tank heroes. Entirely because of Mercy's design I have dabbled in Support, but I'm frankly not that great at it, so DPS and Tanks it is. I'm in the mood to write about Overwatch, but at the time of writing Overwatch 2 has not yet launched and the original has been shut down. I missed the beta, haven't played for at least a year, and I'm nowhere near enough of an expert to comment on anything meaningful. That's why I'm ranking all of Overwatch's Tanks by how well they could drive a real tank.

Are you kidding? He's a hamster. I know he drives his own mech, but that's specially designed for him. In a real tank he'd just be a useless hamster. Bottom of the list.

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Overwatch finally got a Black woman with the launch of Overwatch 2, but it's odd that they are still outnumbered in the game by animals. In any case, Winston has the opposite problem of Wrecking Ball. He's a big ol' gorilla, and therefore too large for the tank. He's above Wrecking Ball entirely because if you could squeeze him in there (give him a big buttery butt or something), he could probably make a go of it. But also, even then he'd probably break the controls, so second bottom it is.

I'm sure Sigma could design a tank fairly well, and might even be able to get his hands dirty enough to maintain and fix one. But driving one? Nah. Sigma's a nerd, and tanks aren't for nerds. Plus, his gravity-based powers don't seem like a good fit for a tank, even if they're a good fit for a Tank. Also the tank too small for he gotdamn feet.

Here we have the same problem as Winston - Orisa is too big and likely too strong to operate a