The first time I reached Anor Londo in Dark Souls, it was like being punched in the face, kicked in the teeth, and then chucked over a cliff in a bodybag tied to cinderblocks. Unforgivingly brutal? Not even cutting it. The rafters with the prickly ranged enemies, the walkways with archers firing comically large arrows, and the cramped rooms full of silver knights are why this city is so infamous. But I soldier through to the end, slaying Ornstein & Smough after countless deaths, only to find a giant woman in a chair, unnervingly relaxed. There’s a message by her, “Amazing chest ahead.” After that gruelling journey, I’m sitting here chuckling to myself.
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Dark Souls is an online game but it’s also intrinsically lonely. Its entire world is built around uncomfortable isolation, yet you can summon help or invade others, choosing to be an absolute twat as you make their game harder than it already is. A big part of maintaining this loneliness is thanks to how communication in the game works. You can’t talk to people. Not really. Instead, you can leave breadcrumbs behind in the form of messages which are made entirely out of pre-written prompts. “Amazing chest ahead” strings together a series of words meant to reference loot chests, not Gwynevere’s.
Some are helpful, pointing you to secret walls, treasure, or warning you of coming ambushes. But then some tell you to walk off a cliff and you do because all the others have been helpful so far. Bastards. But then others are comical and outright nonsensical. Take Dark Souls 2. It’s chock-full of empty rooms and haphazardly put together levels, a leftover symptom of its rushed
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